This was my third baby... I had no illusions that I would spring right back to pre-pregnant shape any time soon. I knew you left the hospital still looking full term. Or I knew I did.
The first week was the hardest, I couldn't even figure out what to throw on to come down and watch TV with my mom and Ross. I couldn't even figure out what to throw on if I was ALONE with the kids-- or what to throw on to sleep. By definition, nothing in my closet (or Ross's, sadly) could be "thrown on". It was more of a peel and shimmy and tuck.
My teenie friend, Lizzie had always told me of times people asked her if she was pregnant after she'd had a baby. I always assured her it was actually a compliment. It meant the REST of her body was still teenie tiny and all she had was tummy left from her 9-pounders. Who wouldn't?
I promised myself (knowing it would happen this time), that it wouldn't even offend me, why WOULDN'T people think I'm pregnant? I'd rather that than have them assume that I ALWAYS sport this.... unique.... figure.
So when I went to the gym yesterday for the first time since I had Finn, and decided to wear a fitted ribbed tank just like I would have before, I knew perfectly well that my very-much-still-over-sized tummy was on display. I had decided it was a lot easier for me to dress like I'm still pregnant and just embrace my very convex profile than to try to find something loose enough to actually be loose.
So obviously I shouldn't have been surprised when this nice random, older man stopped at my elliptical machine and started telling me about his daughter who was in labor RIGHT THEN. He was rattling on about her as I was thinking "hmm.... how nice, he must recognize me from before and know I just had a baby"...
That's what's sad. It didn't click--- until he finally said "so when are you due?"
"Oh..... er... I'm not pregnant, I just HAD a baby--- uh... but I'm not offended!" --- I really did belt that out at the end. In some attempt to convince myself I'd won? I was mature and realistic and fully prepared for those kinds of questions... wasn't even going to phase me... I'd promised myself I wouldn't be offended.
But now there's still this uncomfortable guy in front of me trying to back-pedal as I try desperately to make it all UN-awkward and give him (or me) excuses like "he was almost 10 pounds!" and "it was my third!".... and "you know.... all that holiday eating...sheesh!"... while he's slowly inching back and just repeating--- "well congratulations."
And then I'm left there pretending to read my book on my new kindle (LOVE it)... wondering who around me was tuned in and is now feeling sorry for me. And as I resist the urge to make an announcement on the gym's loud speaker, "NOT offended! Fully prepared for this reaction!--- aware of abnormally large tummy!" I realize that there's just no way around it. I can't protect my pride by convincing everyone I'm fine with my bowl full of jelly. Turns out, it's quite embarrassing- for everyone.
Oh-- if only I could freeze Finn at today but fast-forward my body a couple of months...