Wednesday, November 03, 2010

31 weeks



- I'd usually prefer to cut off the opposite part, and leave just the head.... seems ironic. (That weird line at the top is the top of my computer armoire... which casts a reflection-- hence the giraffe-look. Took me a second..)

- Once I hit 30 weeks, I felt like I was in the home stretch.... but now I already feel like I've run out of steam... forgot to pace myself... and just might wack one of these last hurdles with my knee and fall on my face like I did in high school. Less literally.

-If ONLY it were just 330 meters.... feels more like a marathon. Or like that crazy cross-country run that Forrest Gump did. No I would NOT know what that feels like. (The marathon I mean... the other is clearly too obvious to mention) I haven't joined that craze yet.

- But I want to after this baby comes. I think I need a competitive goal after it's all over. Not a marathon... but some real race. Maybe a fun one. Like a Ragnar.... is it just us Mormons or is it a new craze with everyone? I'm feeling nervous about this whole third-time thing. Like maybe things will never really go back where they started. I think a new goal might help.

- This photo? That's pretty much my uniform, I get in one of my black pairs of workout pants, and one of my long enough black tanks (I like other colors... but seem to only find them long enough in black???) every morning before the gym, and take my sweet time changing out of it. Finding something else... even just to wander the house, has proven to be EXTREMELY challenging. I really don't remember it being this bad with the last ones.

- People constantly ask me when I'm due and then act shocked that it's not sooner. It's great.

- Something positive? He moves like a crazy animal and I LOVE it. I see my belly jolting out of the corner of my eye all day long.... this is what I miss when it's over. I think it's amazing to feel this tiny person I'm going to love so INTENSELY, growing and moving around so cozy and safe inside my belly. Bonding with me. I love it.

- Not so positive: (some more, I should say) Are you ready? These last couple of nights have been the worst sleep ever, with:

-My usual crippling sciatic pain at the slightest movement.

-A very impatient bladder that unfortunately requires more than slight movement.

- Like a THOUSAND calf cramps that pull me out of sleep, with that confusing... do I stretch it or relax it.... I'm too tired to remember! battle going on in my head.

- Then of course I have a stupid cold that makes me feel like I'm drowning (gross I know, where you're swallowing all night long so you can still breathe.) And I'm scared because I remember feeling like once I got a cold when I was pregnant before.... my body could never kick it. Crossing fingers.

- Mixed with the results from getting the Pertussis vaccine the other day. She warned me that my arm would be pretty sore... I was thinking like a little bruise. I DIDN'T think it would make it so I couldn't sleep comfortably on my right side which is how I ALWAYS sleep right now so I can have my fan blowing right in my face. What's an overheated pregnant woman to do?

-Why didn't she offer to do it in my LEFT arm? So it wouldn't kill every time I lift it to pass a sippy back in the car or put dishes back in the cupboard, or brush my hair teeth? (who am I kidding... I don't brush my hair.)

- I'm aware that I don't use bullets right.... no consistency. Still- I think it's how my mind works these days. If it works. I've fixed SO many weird spelling/grammar or totally nonsensical mistakes just as I've written this. I'm sure you'll find more.

- I feel a little like Gloria from Modern Family... and English is my first language.

- That's misleading. English is my only language.

-Was that not the funniest episode ever? "Welcome to the Nay-ber-hoooood...." I can still hear her weird Americanized Latin voice and a laugh rises to my throat every time. "Who wants to live in a world where dogs eat dogs?!"

- Back to pregnancy--- you'll be happy you're still reading if you've made it this far... weight gain? dun dun dun----- 39 pounds. And I still have 8 weeks to go. I'm pretty sure my last pregnancies capped out at 40. I'm blaming the boy.

- I've got so much left to do--- I haven't bought him anything... I bought the paint for the room but that's as far as I've gotten. We've got a list of names, but are very noncommittal. And I'm realizing that weekends are filling up and with the holidays--- he's going to be here before we know it. Even if I do feel like my body might give up far before then.

- I can't wait. I know it's going to be hard and overwhelming--- and we'll be tired--- and I'll long for the days of huge firm belly when it's sloshing around afterwards (sorry for that visual-- particularly if you're a boy)--- but I still can't wait. I can't wait to be forced to ignore everything else when possible--- and just lay with him snuggled into me on the couch at night-- or watch him rise and fall on Ross' chest with his breathing. Or bring the girls home from school just to gather around and watch him be cute. I can't wait to see his face in the operating room (c-sections), and I can't wait 'till that same face REALLY focuses on my face for the first time a few weeks later. And then smiles.... and then smiles at his sisters.... and yet I know I'll want to freeze him right away and just watch his body arch into the C when he yawns for the rest of my life.

- I can't wait.

15 comments:

bailey d. said...

Oh....so sorry, Lil. Hang in there. Only 8 more weeks to go! Can't wait to see him; I can't even imagine how CUTE he'll be...and put the name list up...PLEASE???

Love ya!

PS - You look SOOOO dang cute. I love it.

Megan Daly said...

lol. Lillie you crack me up with your writing. I am reading this wishing I was 31 weeks. I have gained 18lbs already and at only 17 weeks so great I know I am heading to the 50's range for sure.

Hang in there girl! You look amazing by the way. truly.
Oh and I totally agree with the gloria from modern family. That episode was hilarious!

Brandon or Michelle said...

hey lady. you have a fan club. I am a member. :) keep doing what you do, and know that if you become a ragnarian, I will be very jealous. I used to run a little, and it's HARD!

S.A.S. said...

I can't wait too! A boy, in the Biesinger household at long last (Ross is a man, doesn't count). When can I meet him? What is your exact due date (why am I SO bad at remembering due dates - oh wait, I know, because they seem kind of arbitrary to me now)?
I don't know if it makes you feel better or worse, since I wasn't small when I saw you last, but I gained 55 lbs. with Julia. Yes, 15 more than your 40. So you still look AMAZING to me. You'll always be an incredibly gorgeous pregnant woman.
Love & miss you

Christin said...

Thank you so much Lillie for posting a picture of you with clothes on the floor in the background. You are such a cute prego mommy. Hang in there, you're almost done.

Christin

Jennifer said...

You are so cute! Hang in there! I feel so bad for you with all the aches and pains. I remember that calf pains. Those are killer!!! I never could figure out what to do with it. I guess it's a circulation problem? Who knows, but I hate it. You are going to LOVE having a boy. The happy kicks and movement and the excitement of the new baby to snuggle are what will get you through!

Francis said...

You look amazing! hang in there! soon you will see your precious little baby! me and my husband are so not committed to any of our names on our list for boys! cant wait to see what you have come up with!

Rachelle@atticgals.blogspot.com said...

Been there, done than. Thanks for reminding me why I am done.

Hang in there Hun. Trust me, he'll be in high school before you know it! (and you think pregnancy is rough!)

just kidding :)

brooke said...

I can't wait!

Anonymous said...

Lillie,
Everytime I catch up on your blog, I find myself going through a series of "me too"'s and "I know, right?"'s... Then there's the under my breath chuckiling to myself:) I love it! Wish we were closer geographically speaking...
Sending you my love, and all my empathy (I'm 38 wks now with #3,
Anika

Anika said...

Wow... I just need to say I echo your sentiments regarding grammatical and spelling errors... My previous post is embarrasingly full!! LOL! ...and to think that's a pet peeve of mine! hahaha!
Just to reiterate- 38 weeks... ;)

xoxo,

Anika

Rachelle said...

You are beautiful, as always, and while you feel like your brain/thoughts are scattered...they resonate with so many of us so thank you for sharing them.
(teary eyed) I miss you so much and am so sad that I'm missing this crazy but wonderful time in your life.
I love you and can't wait to see you soon!

Katie said...

Ok- besides your belly the rest of you looks totally slim! And I am so impressed that you are making it to the gym often enough for that to be your uniform. You look great and I am so excited for you guys to have a boy. I'll post a pic of me soon and then you'll feel better. I promise. Hugs to you all!

Portia said...

Lilly, I know what you mean about the C stretch, we call it the bum stretch and it is one of my favorite things a newborn does... after being squished in fetal position they've got plenty of back arching to do.
I am so excited for you and I have only seen you a couple of times your whole pregnancy and only for a few minutes... it has been way too long girl! Hope you are all well!

alliehoopes said...

oh for cute. 31 weeks....so that means by the middle of February you'll want to be driving to San Diego to go visit family right? and if we happened to be medical conferencing or something you'd totally go to seaworld or the children's museum or something with us, right? right.